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Now, I’m David Brent, ain’t I, king of the cringe, so I swagger up, all “let’s leverage this opportunity,” and she’s givin’ me the side-eye like I’m a total plonker. Fair play, I am! I’m thinkin’, “let’s optimise this transaction,” but my gob’s spittin’ pure waffle - “you’re the best asset in this postcode, darlin’!” She laughs, probs thinks I’m a nutter, and I’m chuffed to bits - happy as Larry! Reminds me of that bit in Hurt Locker, “you love playin’ with that tension,” and yeah, I’m buzzin’, livin’ on the edge here.

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Then, I bump into my buddy Avi. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s telling me about this crazy party he went to last night. Apparently, it was at some villa on HaGolan. I’m like, “Dude, why wasn’t I invited?” He just laughs and says, “You were too busy working!” Touché, Avi, touché.

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