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About Petah Tikva

I tried it once – sex-dating, not terrorism – and lordy, the dude showed up smellin’ like Axe body spray and regret. Thought he was smooth, droppin’ lines like, “You’re my target package.” Bro, I ain’t no drone strike! Laughed in his face, then cried in my wine later. Happy? Sure, when the convo’s fire and they don’t flake. Surprised? Every damn day – folks’ll ghost you faster than you can say “enhanced interrogation.” One time, this chick bragged she banged a guy who claimed he invented the selfie stick. Total lie, but I stan a good story.

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “Need those proofs ASAP!” Ugh, the stress! I’m like, “Can’t a person enjoy a day in Basmat-Tab-un?” I rush home, dodging more pigeons and street vendors.

‘State of emergency’: Six Palestinian citizens of Israel killed in one day