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About Dundalk

Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no cakewalk, neither! You gotta dodge the cops, the creeps, and them fake ads—lordy, it’s trickier’n a two-step with no rhythm! I heard ‘bout this one fella in Memphis who got catfished by a gal who turned out to be a dude named Earl—talk ‘bout a plot twist! I’d be laughin’ my beehive off if it weren’t so dang pitiful. “Tell me the truth!” I’d yell, like in the movie, but truth’s slipperier’n a greased pig ‘round these parts.

Nobody is coming soon

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While we’re waiting, I spot this kid, Jamie, from the local school. He’s trying to impress his friends by doing some skateboard tricks. He totally wipes out right in front of me. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, it’s Lucan! You gotta have some street cred, right? But he gets up, brushes it off, and goes again. Respect, kid.

Death Notice of Úna O’ Rourke (Lucan, Dublin)