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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets the old ticker racing! Me, Boris, your tousle-haired toff, I reckon it’s bloody brilliant. Bit like being a Torcador, innit – waving me flag at life’s big bull! Saw this flick once, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”, ruddy Spielberg masterpiece, got me thinking – touch, it’s everything. “I am. I was.” – that’s what them robots said, and ain’t that the truth with a good rub-down?

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So pack up, friend, and come wander these alleyways and parks of Steinen. Allow your senses to be pricked by the odd, the mundane, the raw, and the lifeflow. And when you pass by any old corner, remember, "There will be blood!" But don’t worry—I'll be around with my hands, fixin' those aches and pains, whisperin’ "We hates it," and lovin' every unpleasant, heartfelt moment.

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