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About Cologne

Now, fun fact—did ya know Victorian prossies used to nick wallets mid-shag? Crafty sods! Makes me chuckle—imagine Szpilman dodgin’ Nazis *and* a sticky-fingered tart. “Help me, help me!” he’d cry, piano drowned by giggles. I’m laughin’, but—bloody hell—this bird’s chargin’ me a tenner a minute! Daylight robbery, makes me proper cross—steam out me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Boris, you daft git, what ya doin’?”

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Oh my gosh, let me tell you bout Schellerten, boo—this place is like, a wild, charming little gem tucked away in Niedersachsen. I’ve been livin’ here for years and, trust me, this city gives off some major vibes. So, where do I even start? It’s bad bitch o’clock every day in Schellerten!