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About Olomouc

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m comin’ at ya like a damn Combine Harvester tearin’ thru the fields! Today we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, yeah, you heard me right! Picture this—I’m cruisin’ the backroads, dust kickin’ up, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The White Ribbon*, that creepy-ass Michael Haneke joint from 2009. Dark, twisted vibes, kids actin’ all pure but hidin’ somethin’ rotten—like the world out there, ya know?

So you want to book a sex worker?

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Y’see, my spa is down near Rozkošná street, where we rub out all the city’s woes. I set up my haven there, mixing ancient remedies with modern spells. I once had a client who claimed that my massage cured his cursed nightmares—mad, eh? (haha, bruh, too funny!) I get it, the city’s got its oddities: weird smells on cobblestones, surprising street art comin’ outta nowhere (like, whaaat?), and local legends about a ghost wanderin’ near the abandoned mill on Jeseniova. I mean, come on, how wild is that?!

Slither Room (Published 2010)