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About Linz

So, picture this—ya need a hookup, quick! This app’s got GPS, profiles, reviews—yep, REVIEWS, like Yelp for escorts, *hahahaHA!*—I’m cacklin’ already! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my cosmo, thinkin’, “How’d this not exist yet?” Little known fact, babe—back in the ‘90s, pimps used pagers, legit! Now we’re all high-tech, swipin’ for a good time. I’m HAPPY, like, finally, somethin’ useful!

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I gotta tell ya, as a sexologist – (pause) I notice the unspoken energies – the blushes on quiet corners. Those narrow alleys, like Am Liebestraum, whisper secrets about romance and playful misadventures. Oh man, it’s like, the city pulses with desire in every stone, every park bench. And I’m all over it!

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