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Downside? Some schmuck’s always tryna upsell ya – “happy ending, Tone?” Fuck off, I ain’t that desperate! “The children are watching,” like Haneke says, so keep it classy, sorta. Anyway, erotic-massage, it’s art, it’s dirty, it’s Jersey – greasy, real, and damn good. Try it, don’t be a stunad!

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First off, I hit the streets of Krupina. I’m talking about the main square, Námestie SNP. It’s usually buzzing with life, but today? Crickets. Just me and a couple of pigeons having a staring contest. I’m like, “Where’s everyone at?” Then I remember, it’s a Tuesday. Classic.

After long journey, Ukrainians in Saskatchewan inch closer to final destinations