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About Palermo

So, picture this – some dodgy parlour, right? Dim lights, smells like cheap lavender and sweat. Bloke’s there, hands oiled up, givin’ you the “relax, love” spiel. Mate, I’d sooner trust a Tyrell with my throne than this git with my bits! Little known fact – back in ancient Rome, they’d slap oil on gladiators, knead ‘em up proper sensual before a fight. Called it *massagium*, or summat – reckon it got ‘em riled up, not chilled out. Bet half of ‘em were ragin’ hard-ons in the arena, poor sods.

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After that chaos, I take a break. I’m chillin’ by the old church on Piazza Municipio. It’s this stunning place, man. The architecture is just wow. I sit there, sipping on some water, and I see this old dude feeding pigeons. He’s got a whole crowd around him. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re the pigeon whisperer!”

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