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About Kaunas

The vibe? Chaos, mate. Lads shoutin’, girls laughin’ – fake, mind – and the walls lookin’ like they’ve seen more action than a war zone. Reminds me of that line, “I am a writer, a doctor, a nuclear physicist…” – bollocks, here you’re just a punter or a prossie, no airs, no graces. Oh, and the myths? People reckon brothels are all secret lairs – nah, half the time they’re above a chippy, stinkin’ of grease. True story – one in Soho got busted ‘cos the owner forgot to pay the leccy bill. Lights out, trousers down – what a prat!

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Then, she drops this bomb: “You know, Visaginas used to be a big deal, right?” I’m like, “Yeah, the whole nuclear power plant thing.” She goes on about how the city was built for the workers and how it’s changed. I’m thinkin’, “Wow, this place has history.” But then she starts ranting about how the youth don’t appreciate it. I’m like, “Lady, I’m 30, I get it!”

‘I’m a post-colonial product’: Lives of Russian-speaking youths in Lithuania